45 at 45 October 9, 2018

I can’t believe I’ve been on this journey of life for 4 and half decades. Age 5 or 45, I’ve always been that introspective soul trying to find meaning.

What I know to be true at this juncture in life, is that although I’ve gained some insight throughout the years, the learning has only begun. I am confident that whatever I’m experiencing now is preparing me for what is still yet to come.

As I celebrate the big 45, almost half a century on this planet, I find nothing more cathartic than reflecting on what I’ve learned. And so here are my top 45 at 45:

1. Reflecting is cathartic! Much growth comes from taking time to look back and simply realize.
2. Living in gratitude keeps us humble. We all have more than we deserve.
3. Saying  thank you for the little things means more than the big ones.
4. You don’t have to be the best. Just do your best and the rest will follow.
5. Allow yourself to be weird and different. Fitting in is overrated.
6. Avoid the path of least resistance, it typically doesn’t lead to greatness.
7. Trust your instincts. We have them for a reason and they are always right.
8. Take risks. Walk the road less traveled as often as possible.
9. Run your own race. What others are doing simply doesn’t matter.
10. Know who you are. This comes from consistent self reflection.
11. Stay close to those who bring out the best in you.
12. Steer clear of those who bring out that other side of you.
13. Question your beliefs. It’s the only way for authentic conviction.
14. Know your kids. Our time with them is short lived. Make it count.
15. Honor your parents. They gave you life. They deserve respect.
16. Have an open mind. It’s the only way we grow.
17. Listen. There is always something to learn.
18. Be wrong. It builds character.
19. Appreciate your heritage. Honor your peeps.
20. Have a voice. Stand up for what you believe.
21. Don’t be afraid to disagree. But do it tactfully.
22. Spend time in nature. It’s healing in every way.
23. Stay teachable. No matter what we achieve, there is more to learn.
24. Don’t jab. Refrain from making those mean, childish comments.
25. Forgive. No one is perfect.
26. Be playful. It’s good for the soul.
27. Find time for you. Recharge in whatever way you need to on a daily basis.
28. Tell people you love them. You may never get another chance.
29. Work hard. It’s the cornerstone for success.
30. Rest. It’s also the cornerstone for success.
31. Exercise daily. Endorphins are magic.
32. Stay away from black and white thinking. There is gray in everything.
33. Avoid passive aggressive behavior at all cost. No one wins.
34. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Be impeccable with words.
35. Read. Literature holds the key to knowledge.
36. Encourage others. We get what we give.
37. Spend time with those less fortunate. And help where you can.
38. Avoid excessiveness. Too much of anything is a problem.
39. Celebrate others’ wins. And celebrate yours. Keep vicious competition away.
40. Remember that you can start over at any time. Life, a day, a minute.
41. Take nothing for granted. Everything we have can be lost in a second.
42. Breathe. It is the solution for everything.
43. Pray or meditate. Find ways to connect with the source outside of self.
44. Love. Everything. Everyone.
45. BE YOUR AUTHENTIC SELF.

I am a 45 year old, introverted, left handed, feisty, competitive, obsessive, strong willed, determined woman who has struggled with self esteem and control my whole life.

I have a past that still haunts me, I have a present situation that often scares me, I have a future that I know nothing of.

BUT….

I am extremely self aware and approach life with heart & soul.

I have two children that I love more than words can express. I have a husband who is my true partner in life and my very best friend. I have an incredible career where I’m surrounded by like minded, beautiful souls. I have friends who have stood by my side through every peak and valley. I have a family who would do anything for me. I have an understanding of God and the universe that may not be like anyone else’s understanding, but it is mine and it is real.

I know and respect who I am. Do I like every part? No! But do I think every part of who I am is necessary? Absolutely. Every dark side of Denise has light. Every battle scar produces new awareness. Every challenge creates growth.

And although turning 45 seems almost surreal, I realize that this journey is about so much more than myself. I am  just scratching the surface of this quest for eternity that has only just begun.

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